I promise to write 3 times a day to make up for lost time! Lies don't get more obvious.

The absence is due to an internet detachment, other things have filled up time. Yesterday Dear John taught me something about time: it always runs out. I expected more from the film, but still I felt a level of intimacy with John and Salvanah until the story unfolded unnaturally. I think films are movies but movies are not films.

I remember liking this:

" The only one film I want to make, I will never make because it is Impossible. It is a film on love, or of love, or with love. To speak in the mouth, to touch the breast, for women to imagine and see the body, the sex of the man, a caress a shoulder, things as difficult to show and intend as horror, as war, and sicknesses are. ''

Jean-Luc Godard

( I typed that out, because i can't paste in blogger anymore! )

My favourite module this semester is Politics... a great lecturer and good topics and an open platform with so many ideas, ideas and more ideas. Such fascinating words as panapticon, false consciousness, John Locke Thomas Hobbes Plato neo-realism anarchy... words that had no meaning to be before.

On Fridays I revisit ballet, a childhood enemy. I enjoy it now, possibly as much as I used to hate it. It hurts more but makes greater sense. I walked in the rain in pink tights, the rain and mud dirtied it, and a car gliding across water made my legs look like they belong to a brown spotted cow.

It is funny, I want to write; there can only be too much to talk about when u disappear this long, but memory is strange, I don't remember well and in my mind there are just pockets of memory, not distinct enough to form paragraphs. I always wonder why memory happens this way: as time transcends we forget more and more... and we try to hold on to certain images, visual perhaps or maybe a feeling? But as that memory blurs we struggle more intensely to keep it and this image becomes more vivid and colored as we want it to be. Eventually we are not sure if we made something up ourselves! I am not making sense here =)