A stranger experiences a heartbreak and I feel it through her words, what is love when defied by circumstances? It must be bittersweet, a haunting ache.
At home it is ticking after 7, it is a familiar chaos, dinner will happen soon. My dad hurries in the kitchen, my brothers swarm the living room, the sound of feet clapping against the marbled floor creating a backdrop for Rod Steward's raspy voice, he sings that he is sailing, he is flying, like a bird. My mother divides the rice into portions; it is never correct and we will soon make mutual swaps or leave residue on the plates.
My first post in 2010 I realise! Secretly I have penned words in another journal, still opting to type than to scratch ink on paper. There is greater organisation and speed but less personalisation. Anyway I have less than remarkable penmanship. Because it is a private space I write freely, unabashedly, and with a noted recklessness. I think it interesting when my posts in these 2 spaces begin to parellel each other, like applying an experiment on myself.
On New Year's Eve, which I have proclaimed some nonchalance over, I found myself stuck in a cubicle in a public restroom as the time ticked 12.00, ran out and reunited, watched fireworks exploding into the Singapore, sky quite by accident; . Prior to that, we took off to the Flyer and looked down at a ready nation, lighted up in brilliant colors, waiting for 2010 to turn into reality and 2009 history, to creep into their calendars, for their resolutions to begin, for new days. A transition celebrated. The first 2 hours of the year must be some of my worst; it was painful attempting to hoard a taxi. Only at 3 am did wonderful things happen to me. I will keep it close to my heart.
The week before school begins, bidding woes are back and wicked germs are crawling in my body, stealing my voice. I hope to see friends and also steal more hours lying in the sun with Jason, skin prickling as we get roasted, and books under the deckchair, and splashing in the water, chasing, treading, floating, submerging, kicking, blinking.
Like free spirits.